Valentine's Day in 2006

Here is part of the valentine I mailed to Mark in 2006:

*  The verse in the picture is the last line of a poem on the rest of the card that was a rather suggestive takeoff from the Dr. Seuss book, Green Eggs and Ham (an example of a line from that book is "Would you like them here or there?").

Here's the background to this card:

Our third date was Saturday, February 11, 2006, in Granbury this time.  It was an early Valentine's Day.  Mark gave me a dozen red roses and a number of CDs he'd burned for me, including a couple by Bering Strait (an example of their lyrics here).  We had wine and cheese and chocolate and a good time.

But - I commented to a friend in my LiveJournal the next morning, Sunday, February 12, that, "He was feeling kinda lousy when I left (earlier than planned), and I feel pretty blah this morning - stupid sinuses in both cases."

I found out about an hour after making that comment that Mark's cough was worse, so I e-mailed him, "I stopped at Target last night (it was still open at 9 PM) and got that humidifier.  I also bought some lemon herbal tea and some honey. ... I am going to drive back down there and I will bring this stuff ... "

I did in fact drive all the way down to Granbury that Sunday to deliver these items.  Mark was definitely sick, and whatever he had, I got too.  (We had talked on Saturday about how a humidifier might help him feel better.  I still have that humidifier I bought - we used it whenever the relative humidity in the house got too low in the winter.)  

As for the card - I don't remember exactly when I mailed it.  It would have been after 8pm on Saturday the 11th, based on the note I wrote inside it (and maybe I wrote the note before I left Granbury?), so maybe I dropped it into a mailbox after I went to Target that evening. The envelope was postmarked February 13 in Fort Worth, so it might not have arrived in Mark's mailbox until February 15.  Or it could just be he was still feeling sick enough on Valentine's Day that he didn't check his mailbox that day. Here's what he wrote after he opened the card.

from:		Mark Gresham <********@gmail.com>
to:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
date:		Wed, Feb 15, 2006, 10:43 AM
subject:		Cards

I got both cards. I really loved the one that I can hold in my hand.

 

I can do the things that you mention in the card, but I don't do well, giving cards.

 

Your card is perfect. I will keep it forever.

 

Mark

I'd also sent him an e-card; that's why he said "both."  I responded to his e-mail: 

from:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
to:		Mark Gresham <********@gmail.com>
date:		Wed, Feb 15, 2006, 12:01 PM
subject:		Re: Cards

I picked out the card for you way back the day after our first "date" in Grapevine.  I'd gone to pick up some slide film I'd had processed ... and went into the card shop next door to get the valentines for the kids. ... that one caught my eye and seemed just perfect ,,,

 

That is so sweet of you to say you will keep it forever.  Considering that you supposedly still have a bronze-colored swimsuit you say I wore, and the Gordon Lightfoot cassette, and who knows what else, I believe it. ...

--------

And yes, he still had the bronze-colored swimsuit (that I wore only on the sailboat) and the Gordon Lightfoot cassette tape I gave him, both from 23+ years earlier.

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

Second Date the Second Time Around

Here's a series of e-mails to set up our second date the second time around, which happened on Saturday, February 4, 2006:

from:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
to:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
date:		Mon, Jan 30, 2006, 5:24 PM
subject:		progress

I talked to my son last night, and he asked me to go sailing* with him next Saturday. ... 

 

I assumed that you would be working on Saturday, but I should have asked.

 

Talk to you later.

 

Mark

from:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
to:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
date:		Mon, Jan 30, 2006, 5:47 PM
subject:		Re: progress

Well, I am not working Saturday - at least not at the moment. ... However, I definitely think you should go sailing with your son!  Much as I would like to see you again - and as soon as possible.  IF (and only if) y'all finish up early and YOU are heading home ALONE - don't want to intrude on you and your son - and you aren't beat, I could meet you for dinner somewhere.  Lewisville* isn't too far from Grapevine (or Denton if I happen to be there).  You have my cell.  I can be ready on pretty short notice.

... I am wearing the earrings again today.  later - A

from:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
to:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
date:		Tue, Jan 31, 2006, 2:03 PM
subject:		Saturday

I want to make some time for us on Saturday. I'll leave Lewisville about 4 or 5 pm and call you then. Perhaps we can go to someplace in the area where we had lunch or someplace else that I can find without getting too lost.

 

Let me know what you think.

 

Mark

from:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
to:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
date:		Tue, Jan 31, 2006, 3:03 PM
subject:		Re: Saturday

I'm torn between dying to see you again and not wanting to screw up anything with your son ....  

 

Why don't we play it by ear Saturday?  You might be having a great time with Drew (right name?) and y'all might want to have dinner together.  But if not--well, I'll either be in Denton or Grapevine (probably the latter), and we can connect pretty quickly - just call. ...

from:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
to:		Amanda Pape <*********@gmail.com>
date:		Tue, Jan 31, 2006, 8:52 PM
subject:		Re: Saturday

I plan to be in Lewisville by 9:30am. He will probably have something planned with his girlfriend for later on ... and he will be ready for me to be gone.

 

Plan on my call. I really want to see you.

 

Mark

--------

*There was at least one phone conversation between the e-mails above and the ones below, where we talked about possible places to meet.  Mark had given his 22-foot Catalina sailboat, The Wagon, to his son Drew in 2002, and Drew had it in a marina near where he was living in Lewisville, which is roughly between Grapevine and Denton.

--------

from:		Mark Gresham <megresham@*********>
to:		Amanda Pape <*********@gmail.com>
date:		Thu, Feb 2, 2006, 3:35 PM
subject:		Saturday

Did we decide where to meet on saturday? How about the Main Street Blues Room**? Or any other place that you would like. Let me know.

 

Mark

from:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
to:		Mark Gresham <megresham@*********>
date:		Thu, Feb 2, 2006, 3:42 PM
subject:		Re: Saturday

I thought we decided to meet in the parking lot behind Esparza's, but it might be better to meet at Main Street Blues.   I think the back-up plan was that if we are not allowed into Main Street Blues in our jeans, we'd go to the Italian restaurant (Ravioli's) next to Esparza's.

from:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
to:		Amanda Pape <*********@gmail.com>
date:		Thu, Feb 2, 2006, 4:23 PM
subject:		Re: Saturday

Good plan. See you at Blues. One good thing about Texas; they rarely have dress codes. Too many rich weird people.

 

Mark

from:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
to:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
date:		Thu, Feb 2, 2006, 4:27 PM
subject:		Re: Saturday

... Doesn't matter where we eat - not coming for the food. ;)  Looking forward to your call (hopefully) on Saturday.

--------

So the date did in fact happen on Saturday, February 4, at Main Street Blues in Grapevine (**which no longer exists).  However, Mark was not feeling well.  I wrote this after I got home from our date:

from:		Amanda Pape <*********@gmail.com>
to:		mark gresham <megresham@**********>
date:		Sat, Feb 4, 2006, 11:33 PM
subject:		safe trip

I hope you made it home safely tonight.  Please go see a doctor so I don't get scared like that again. :)

 

Thank you again for a wonderful evening.  I am SO looking forward to next week.  ...

Love, A

--------

Turned out Mark was coming down with something.  We did see each other the following weekend, which resulted in me getting sick with whatever he got.  So, a little break here in our re-romance saga - tune in again on Valentines Day.

Above, Mark talks with "The Sidewalk Judge" - another J. Seward Johnson sculpture (I photographed tons of them in Key West), this one outside the replica Wallis Hotel that houses Messina Hof Winery in Grapevine, on the tenth anniversary of our first date the second time around, January 31, 2016.

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

Dad Would've Been 96 Today

My sister recently sent me various official documents pertaining to our parents.  She was the executor of their estates, but no longer needed these documents since the estates closed long ago. 

The documents included four related to the birth of our father, Frederick Henry Pape (1929-2017).  I already had copies of three of these, but the first one pictured below was one I had never seen before.  It's a hospital birth certificate, which actually is not an "official" birth certificate, but it played a part in a change made nearly 64 years later.

By the way, I was also born at St. Francis Hospital in Evanston, Illinois, as were many of my first cousins who were also born in the north Chicago area.  I believe it was the only Catholic hospital on the north side of Chicago at the time.

Above:  Hospital birth certificate for Frederick Henry Pape, 4 February 1929

Below:  Original State of Illinois Certificate of Registration of Birth for Frederick John Pape, issued May 1930

Above is the original official state birth certificate, issued in May, 1930, over a year after my father's birth.  Note the middle name on it is John, not Henry.  John was the first name of my father's paternal grandfather, my great-grandfather, John Pape (1851-1945).  Frederick Henry was the full name of Dad's maternal grandfather, my great-grandfather Frederick Henry Massmann (1875-1948).

So what happened?  My father retired from his job in late 1992, and needed his birth certificate, either to apply for his pension, or Social Security, or both.  I'm not sure if he had both documents all along, or had to contact his mother, my paternal grandmother, Elizabeth Florence Massmann Pape (1902-2000), to get one or both of these documents.

My grandmother wanted to name him for her father, and that's what she told whoever in the hospital filled out his hospital birth certificate.  Back then, remember, fathers were almost never in the delivery room.  However, I think my grandfather, Paul Robert Pape (1896-1970), was probably the one who filled out the paperwork submitted to the state for the official birth certificate, and named his second son for his two grandfathers.

It doesn't really matter what my father was "supposed" to be named.  He'd been Frederick Henry Pape in school records, military records, work records, his marriage record, and so on.  So Dad filled out the necessary paperwork (below) to get his birth certificate corrected.  Apparently, unlike here in Texas, he did not need an affidavit from someone else testifying to this correction - or if he did, we don't have a copy of it.  The document did have to be notarized, however.

Above:  State of Illinois Affidavit and Certificate of Correction for Frederick John/Henry Pape, submitted 23 January 1993

Below:  Reissued State of Illinois Certificate of Birth for Frederick Henry Pape, issued 3 February 1993

And above is the reissued birth certificate for my father, almost 64 years to the day after his birth.  I did get some new information from this document, that I did not have before - the address where my grandparents and their two oldest children, Paul Robert "Bob" Pape Jr. (1926-2008) and Elizabeth "Betty" Marie Pape Streff (1927-2017), were living at the time of Dad's birth.  I'd assumed it was their long-time home at 2093 W. Lunt in Chicago (where they were by the time the 1930 Census was taken) but instead it was nearby 2545 W. Coyle.

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

January 31, 2006, 12:24 am: live journal

An e-mail I sent Mark, very early on Tuesday, January 31, 2006:

from:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
to:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
date:		Tue, Jan 31, 2006, 12:24 AM
subject:		live journal

I wish there was an easy way for me to tell when I get a new comment on a posting in my Live Journal.  Right now, I can't tell and so sometimes I don't see things until VERY late in the day.  Doesn't help that the time stamps on comments in Live Journal are about six hours ahead of real time - very confusing.  And I am not sure who reads my Live Journal so I have to be rather circumspect.  Still, I was thrilled by one of the comments I got yesterday.

 

I feel very strange.  Sort of like someone kissed me and took my breath away, with an ache deep down inside that just won't go away.  It started Sunday around 5 PM.  Thank God I don't have any pressing schoolwork at the moment or this could be very bad.  I'm so distracted...

 

I've been thinking about your story of you fixing my hair and dressing me up in that sweater dress to go off with that attorney, and how you said it made you feel....I didn't realize it made you feel that way.  I do remember feeling terribly jealous and possessive about you - and when you think about the circumstances back then, those feelings for either of us really didn't make any sense!  Now of course circumstances are different and it might actually make sense....am I making any sense?  Do feelings ever make any sense?  If they did, maybe that achy emptiness would go away....

 

Tomorrow will be a long day.  Working both jobs tomorrow (9 to 5:30 then 6 to 9) won't help.  Or maybe it will, maybe I'll be so busy that I'll forget that I haven't felt this way in so long.

________

Ah yes, that sweater dress.  A gorgeous green angora.  I weighed about 123 when the photo below of me wearing the dress was taken in April 1982, when I was 25.  It was Mark's Christmas gift to me in 1981.  I do remember wearing it to a New Year's Eve party that year that a bunch of City of Corpus Christi attorneys were having.  I had recently befriended one of the female city attorneys - sadly, I cannot remember her name.  Anyway, I think she set me up on a sort of blind date for that party with another city attorney named Ken Fields.  I don't remember much about that New Year's Eve party, only that Ken clearly wasn't interested in me. 

I do remember "feeling terribly jealous and possessive" about Mark, and with "the circumstances back then, those feelings for either of us really didn't make any sense!"  I was single, not interested (at least at that point) in settling down, so Mark was perfect for me (I wasn't his "only" either).  I went out with every guy who asked me out - I was very much playing the field - and was rather involved with a few of them.

And as for 2006 -  I wasn't ready to settle down again then either, at least not at first.  I had another old boyfriend from my college years in the Dallas/Fort Worth area - and plans to see him sometime in February.

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

January 30, 2006 - Why Mark's Nickname is Breathless

The image below (click on it to view it larger) is from the social networking site LiveJournal, which predated Facebook, and which still exists (but who knows for how long - I may be removing my content).  As I said in an e-mail to family and friends (including Mark) on January 27, 2006, writing about the previous week, 

In the interest of not having to type everything all over, I am directing y'all to my online journal:  http://riofriotex.livejournal.com/  (You can check the link for updates in the future).  I don't write in there very often and when I do I try to be careful about what I say since it's public.  

So a Seattle girlfriend (the same one who e-mailed me asking for the "juicy details" of our date, in yesterday's post) also asked about the date on a comment to my January 27, 2006 post on LiveJournal.  I replied with an abbreviated version of what I later e-mailed to her, and here is what happened next, nineteen years ago today:

Mark also posted a comment, calling me Rio (my user name on LiveJournal was riofriotex) and calling himself Breathless.  His nickname stuck and is what I used for many years when talking about him on Facebook.  

Of course, what he wrote took my breath away - "I think that I'm in love again."  Because that's how I felt too.

Here's a transcript of most of the text in the image:

From: (Anonymous)

Date: January 30th, 2006 11:00 am (local)

Re: lunch date?

Dear Rio:

I recently met an old friend and we walked and talked and did useless things and I had a beautiful time.

I think that I'm in love again.

What do you advise?

Breathless

From: riofriotex 

Date: January 30th, 2006 10:29 pm (local)

Re: lunch date?

O...M...G...

That's so weird, Breathless - we are having the same feelings!

My advice is that we both see the old friend again VERY soon.

And in the meantime...private e-mail or cell phones (this forum might qualify as a PDA ;0 ).

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

January 29, 2006: "juicy details on the lunch date"

One of my Seattle friends wanted "juicy details on the lunch date."  Here is my e-mail reply to her:

from: Amanda Pape <****@gmail.com>

to: Kathleen  <****@comcast.net>

date: Sun, Jan 29, 2006, 9:05 PM

subject: Re: whirlwind week

OK here is the juice - the lunch date was six hours long.  We ate first at a Mexican restaurant that I had heard on the radio was quite good.  Food was OK (I've had better), but the margarita was good!

 

Then we went walking down main street (Grapevine), which is rather historic and has interesting shops and galleries.  He bought me some pretty sparkly dangly  earrings, one of which I managed to lose within half an hour (post with butterfly back).  We went back and he bought me ANOTHER pair, this time the fishhook style that seem to stay on me.

 

Halfway through we stopped at one of (seven? eight?) wineries in the town, about four of which are in this historic district, and sampled two wines and talked.  Walked some more, and ended the day (around 4:30 - the shops close around 5 PM) at a boulangerie where we had coffee.

 

The weather was absolutely gorgeous today - short sleeve weather but not at all hot.  Oh, yeah, we kissed a little too - he is still a VERY good kisser.

 

________

Thank goodness I'm terrible about cleaning my inbox, and I still had this e-mail to help me remember this date.  I don't remember a lot of the details - but I can still remember the kiss.  He asked if he could kiss me right before I got in my car at the end of our date.  I wrote this to Mark in an e-mail two days later, on Tuesday, January 31, 2006:

I feel very strange.  Sort of like someone kissed me and took my breath away, with an ache deep down inside that just won't go away.  It started Sunday around 5 PM.  Thank God I don't have any pressing schoolwork at the moment or this could be very bad.  I'm so distracted...

More on breath being taken away tomorrow.

The photo below wasn't taken in January 2006.  Instead, it was taken almost exactly ten years later, on January 31, 2016, when we went back to Grapevine to celebrate the tenth anniversary of our "first date the second time around."  

Amanda Pape and Mark Gresham at Messina Hof Winery, Grapevine, Texas, January 31, 2016 / selfie by Amanda Pape / CC BY_NC_ND 4.0

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

January 28, 2006: Lunch

An e-mail exchange with Mark, back on Saturday, January 28, 2006:

Lunch

from: Mark Gresham <megresham@****>

to: Amanda Pape <****@gmail.com>

date: Sat, Jan 28, 2006, 11:50 AM

subject: Lunch

Esparza's Restaurant is located at 124 E. Worth St. about one block east of Main St. (historic district). It opens at 11am tomorrow.

 

If you can meet me there about 10:30, we can shop, lunch and visit for a while.

 

Mark

from: Amanda Pape <****@gmail.com>

to: Mark Gresham <megresham@****>

date: Sat, Jan 28, 2006, 12:53 PM

subject: Re: Lunch

Let's make it 11 AM, assuming you want to eat then.  It looks like the stores that ARE open (and many aren't, like the chocolate shop -sob! ) don't open until noon or 1 PM (this is the Bible Belt after all, not Southern California or the Pacific Northwest ;0 ).  I did notice (at http://www.grapevinetexasusa.com/ ) that the wine tasting rooms ARE open tomorrow - so maybe more tasting than shopping. See you then.

________

The photo below wasn't taken in January 2006.  Instead, it was taken almost exactly ten years later, on January 31, 2016, when we went back to Grapevine to celebrate the tenth anniversary of our "first date the second time around."  More tomorrow!

Mark Gresham and Amanda Pape at Esparza's Restaurante Mexicano, Grapevine, Texas, January 31, 2016 / selfie by Amanda Pape / CC BY_NC_ND 4.0

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

January 27, 2006: My mind

An e-mail exchange with Mark, back on Friday, January 27, 2006:

My mind

from: Mark Gresham <megresham@****>

to: Amanda Pape <****@gmail.com>

date: Fri, Jan 27, 2006, 12:06 PM

subject: My mind

I admire a straight-forward woman! I'm not sure what I have in mind, but I do know that I still like who you are.

 

I have a magazine called "Grapevine Today." It describes the shops in "old town" on Main Street. We could prowl the shops, have lunch, I can tell you war stories, you can give me English lessons, we can do useless stuff for a few hours and get to know each other again.

 

I'm sure that your schedule is more complicated than mine, so you can arrange it as you wish, if you wish.

 

You can give me a call ( I'm with Verizon ). I talk better than I can type.

 

Mark

from: Amanda Pape <****@gmail.com>

to: Mark Gresham <megresham@****>

date: Fri, Jan 27, 2006, 7:49 PM

subject: Re: My mind

Yeah, but I can type way better than I can talk.  

 

Today I spent the whole day in the Denton Public Library - the Emily Fowler branch downtown.  I am apprenticed (so to speak) to the Special Collections librarian there and it looks like it's going to be fun, being as their special collections are Texas history, Denton history, and genealogy.  For the life of me, I can't remember exactly when you worked for Denton (you did work for Denton???) so I could look you up in some of the city stuff they had.*  Today I mostly browsed the collection to get familiar with it.  Tomorrow I go back in for a full day of (unpaid) work, 9-6.

 

BUT!  I am free Sunday!  I haven't been to Old Grapevine but I am also willing to drive anywhere too  (well, except maybe downtown Dallas or Fort Worth).  I hear there is a good Mexican restaurant in Grapevine in that historic area called Esparza's** - but I will eat anything if you are buying.  Let me know - A

________

* Mark never worked for the City of Denton.  He did work on a master's degree in public administration at what was then North Texas State University (now the University of North Texas) there.  And his father grew up in nearby Krum, within Denton County, and his grandparents are buried in Krum.

** The photo below wasn't taken in January 2006.  Instead, it was taken almost exactly ten years later, on January 31, 2016, when we went back to Grapevine to celebrate the tenth anniversary of our "first date the second time around."  More to come.

Mark Gresham at Esparza's Restaurante Mexicano, Grapevine, Texas, January 31, 2016 / Amanda Pape / CC BY_NC_ND 4.0

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

January 26, 2006: (no subject)

An e-mail exchange with Mark, back on January 26, 2006:

(no subject)

from: Mark Gresham <megresham@****>

to: Amanda Pape <****@gmail.com>

date: Thu, Jan 26, 2006, 7:33 PM

I enjoyed our visit. I hope that your job is going well.

 

As I recall, you sometime were compulsive about things, and that is not good for you. I suggest that you take the time to do something that is completely useless, but fun.

 

Let me know if I can help.

 

Mark

from: Amanda Pape <****@gmail.com>

to: Mark Gresham <megresham@****>

date:         Thu, Jan 26, 2006, 10:00 PM

Being compulsive* can be a positive when there's a lot to get done, but you are right, overall it's not good.    I try to take at least a little time every day to be fun and useless.  Like tonight - watched the second period of the Stars hockey game with my cousin, even though I'm not a big hockey fan (or TV fan either for that matter).  In fact I don't watch TV unless it's with someone else, making it a social event.

 

"Let me know if I can help" - that brings back some memories!  I do remember spending a lot of completely useless but incredibly fun hours with you!  What do you have in mind? ;0

 

I'm trying to get all the stuff I HAVE to do out of the way to free up some more time for fun later (particularly as spring approaches).  Multitasking helps too - such as tonight, worked out for over an hour on the elliptical trainer as I had a very dry 32-page article to read [for a library school class].  Reading it any other way would have put me to sleep.

 

* on the other hand, I suppose dropping in on you Monday WOULD be considered a bit compulsive.  I figured you were just as curious as I was about how the other had changed...and hadn't.  A lot hadn't, and that was good.

 

A

--------

It had been about 11 years since Mark and I had last seen each other in person.  I had moved to the Seattle area in October 1984; he moved to California sometime between January 11 and February 9, 1994, after retiring in Grand Prairie, Texas, the previous year.  We'd kept in touch over the years (he even saved a Christmas card and another letter I'd written to him in 1993, as well as a Christmas card and e-mails in 2003 and 2004).  

Mark's parents had lived since 1960 in Bremerton, Washington, which is a ferry ride away across Puget Sound from the Seattle area.  His father died in December 1990 and his mother in November 1994, and in early 1995, he gave me a call to let me know he'd be in Bremerton to prepare his parents' home to put on the market.  He suggested that we meet for lunch along the waterfront in downtown Seattle (I lived in Lynnwood, a suburb to the north, at that time), as he could take a ferry over from Bremerton.

I do remember that we ate at Ivar's Pier 54 Fish Bar just north of the ferry landing.  I probably had clam chowder.  I remember what I was wearing - a nondescript, rather shapeless denim jumper (long gone) over a brown short-sleeve scoop-neck top (still have), so it must have been a warmer day - spring, rather than winter.  I don't remember the exact date, other than that my kids were in school (so before the end of classes in late June - besides, his parents' house sold on August 30, 1995).

I do have a clue as to the date from a pocket calendar I still have from that year (see image below; click on it to view it larger).  I had a note to "Call Mark Gresham" on Friday, May 12 (written on the Saturday, May 13 box, because there was too much stuff already written in Friday's box).  My son was in third grade and my daughter was in kindergarten, which met all day every Monday and Wednesday and every other Friday.  If I had to make a bet, I'd say we probably had lunch on Monday, May 15, because the kids were in a testing period (so I wouldn't be volunteering in their classrooms), and the only thing I had on my calendar that day was a workout (which I'd either skip or do very early).  I was a volunteer extraordinaire and had a rather busy calendar for a stay-at-home mom.

Above:  Part of my May 1995, with a note to "Call Mark Gresham" circled.

Of course, back then, nobody had cell phones or digital cameras, and film (and processing) wasn't cheap.  I didn't take my camera with me (and Mark did not have his either), so there are no photos from that day.  I do remember thinking Mark looked about the same as in October 1984, when I'd last seen him, except for some gray in his hair.  And the only real change in the next eleven years, from 1995 to 2006, was that now that hair was white.

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

January 23, 2006: Getting Home

An e-mail exchange with Mark, back on January 23, 2006:

Getting home ?

Mark Gresham <megresham@****> 

Mon, Jan 23, 2006 at 6:54 PM

To: Amanda Pape <****@gmail.com>

Would like to know that you got home alright.

Mark

Amanda Pape <****@gmail.com>

Mon, Jan 23, 2006 at 7:34 PM

To: Mark Gresham <megresham@****> 

I surely did.  My cousin and his wife went to the Stars game (they have seasons' tickets) so probably did not really miss me.  I thought he was supposed to be flying though.

 

I'm really glad I called you and stopped.  I had a great time.  We need to do that again sometime.  Right now I have to catch up on schoolwork - I am SO far behind!

 

Amanda

--------

So what prompted this exchange?  My first full week (January 16-22) of my new life in Texas had gone by really fast.  I started my last three library school classes (all online), worked a couple days at my part-time university library assistantship job, got my computer (shipped before I left Washington) delivered and set up, looked for an apartment in Denton, and got invited by my cousin and his wife to just stay in the guest room of their empty-nest house.  (My cousin was a pilot for American Airlines - hence the reference in my e-mail to his flying.)  All this happened just from Monday the 16th through Thursday the 19th.

On Friday, January 20, I went to the American Library Association (ALA) Midwinter Meeting in San Antonio.  I registered for the job placement center as almost an afterthought, but lo and behold, I had two interviews on Saturday!  This made me feel more confident that I might actually find a librarian job when I graduated, and would not be hanging around my cousin's too long afterwards. 

I left the ALA meeting late Saturday, visited my brother in Austin and my parents in Fredericksburg that evening and the next day, and started driving back to Grapevine on Monday, January 23.  There are various routes for this four-hour drive, but when I got to Glen Rose, I opted to turn north, and I pulled over at this roadside park (photo below) a few miles down the road - and called Mark.

Somervell County Picnic Area No. 52, 23 January 2025 / Amanda Pape / CC BY_NC_ND 4.0

We met at a grocery store sign (now gone) on Highway 377 in Granbury, and had dinner at a nearby Chili's Grill & Bar (still there), before I headed back to Grapevine.

Every time I pass this roadside park - like today, coming back from the dentist, when I stopped and took some photos - I remember this as one of the best spur-of-the-moment thoughts I've ever had.

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

Taking A Chance**

Nineteen years ago today, I came back to Texas, after having lived in Washington state for just over 21 years.  

I was about to start my last semester of library school.  I had been doing an online program with the University of North Texas, but had accepted a graduate library assistantship in Denton for my final semester.  My hope was being in Texas would make it easier to get a librarian job IN Texas after graduation in May.

So two days before (Friday the 13th!), I'd finished packing up a ABF UPack ReloCube (6'x7'x8' high) and cleaning my apartment,* then flown to Houston the following day to pick up a 2002 Camry that my aunt, Sister Jean Marie, had arranged for me to purchase from the parish that had been leasing it.  I spent the night at my sister's place, and hit the road the next day to drive to Grapevine, Texas, where my cousin Tom and his wife Karen had agreed to let me stay a while.  (Grapevine is about 31 miles south of Denton.)

Heading north out of Houston on Interstate 45, I could see the giant statue of Sam Houston in Huntsville from over six miles away, "which for some reason I found exhilarating," as I wrote in my LiveJournal at the time.  So I stopped (the statue did not exist when I last lived in Texas), and a fellow visitor took this picture of me by a model of the face of the statue.

* So what does all this have to do with Mark's and my second romance?  We'd kept in touch over the years, but he'd moved to California after retiring in 1993, so our contact was infrequent.  However, while I was cleaning my Washington apartment, just before unplugging the phone to pack it away - he called that landline number.  He told me that he had moved back to Texas, just a couple months earlier, to a little town southwest of Fort Worth called Granbury.  I told him I was flying to Texas the next day and would be living, at least initially, in Grapevine, about an hour away from him.  He gave me his new e-mail address and cell phone number.  He already had my e-mail, but I gave him my cell number too - and we left it at that.... for the moment.

** And why did I title this post, "Taking a Chance"?  That's exactly what I was doing.  I'd left a nice apartment, a full-time paraprofessional job with a large public library system,  with decent pay, good benefits, and great coworkers, and good longtime friends in Washington, to accept a short-term, part-time job (albeit also with decent pay and good benefits), with no certainty of where I'd be living after my cousin's house, and no definitive job prospects beyond the assistantship.  But I needed some change to my life, and as I stated at the start of this post, I figured it would be easier to get a professional librarian position in Texas if I was already there.  (Definitely easier to interview.)

So yes, I was taking a chance.  And as it turned out, taking a chance on love again, too.  More on that in future posts.

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!