Nineteen Years Ago Today: Luke's First Birthday Party

On Saturday, February 25, 2006, Mark went to the first birthday party for his youngest grandchild, Luke, in Allen, Texas.  Here are a few pictures from that day.

Above:  Luke with his uncle Drew Gresham and mom Kim Gresham Williams.

Below:  Mark holding Luke.

Mark e-mailed me copies of these photos, and I wrote back, "I really like the ones of you and Luke.  You photograph really well, you know?  And please wear that blue sweater for me next time it is cold."

Still have that sweater.  I wore it on some cold days this past month.  It kept me warm and made me feel like he was wrapping his arms around me, but it definitely looked better on him.

So where was I that day?  I had volunteered to help with a children's program at the Emily Fowler Branch of the Denton Public Library, where I was doing my library school practicum.  However, it was cancelled because no one signed up. Unfortunately I had only talked to the head children's librarian about helping and not the librarian who was actually going to do the program, so I did not find out ahead of time. Since I'd already gone there from Grapevine (where I was living at the time, with my cousin Tom and his wife Karen), I stayed the whole day and put in some more of my practicum hours. 

I don't think Mark had told his children about me before this point, anyway.  I certainly wasn't expecting to be invited along to this event.  I met his son Drew for the first time three weeks later (on March 18, 2006).  I met his daughter Kim and her family I met his daughter Kim and her family on Easter, April 16, 2006.  I met his daughter Noel and her family on Memorial Day, May 29, 2006.

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

Valentine's Day in 2006

Here is part of the valentine I mailed to Mark in 2006:

*  The verse in the picture is the last line of a poem on the rest of the card that was a rather suggestive takeoff from the Dr. Seuss book, Green Eggs and Ham (an example of a line from that book is "Would you like them here or there?").

Here's the background to this card:

Our third date was Saturday, February 11, 2006, in Granbury this time.  It was an early Valentine's Day.  Mark gave me a dozen red roses and a number of CDs he'd burned for me, including a couple by Bering Strait (an example of their lyrics here).  We had wine and cheese and chocolate and a good time.

But - I commented to a friend in my LiveJournal the next morning, Sunday, February 12, that, "He was feeling kinda lousy when I left (earlier than planned), and I feel pretty blah this morning - stupid sinuses in both cases."

I found out about an hour after making that comment that Mark's cough was worse, so I e-mailed him, "I stopped at Target last night (it was still open at 9 PM) and got that humidifier.  I also bought some lemon herbal tea and some honey. ... I am going to drive back down there and I will bring this stuff ... "

I did in fact drive all the way down to Granbury that Sunday to deliver these items.  Mark was definitely sick, and whatever he had, I got too.  (We had talked on Saturday about how a humidifier might help him feel better.  I still have that humidifier I bought - we used it whenever the relative humidity in the house got too low in the winter.)  

As for the card - I don't remember exactly when I mailed it.  It would have been after 8pm on Saturday the 11th, based on the note I wrote inside it (and maybe I wrote the note before I left Granbury?), so maybe I dropped it into a mailbox after I went to Target that evening. The envelope was postmarked February 13 in Fort Worth, so it might not have arrived in Mark's mailbox until February 15.  Or it could just be he was still feeling sick enough on Valentine's Day that he didn't check his mailbox that day. Here's what he wrote after he opened the card.

from:		Mark Gresham <********@gmail.com>
to:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
date:		Wed, Feb 15, 2006, 10:43 AM
subject:		Cards

I got both cards. I really loved the one that I can hold in my hand.

 

I can do the things that you mention in the card, but I don't do well, giving cards.

 

Your card is perfect. I will keep it forever.

 

Mark

I'd also sent him an e-card; that's why he said "both."  I responded to his e-mail: 

from:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
to:		Mark Gresham <********@gmail.com>
date:		Wed, Feb 15, 2006, 12:01 PM
subject:		Re: Cards

I picked out the card for you way back the day after our first "date" in Grapevine.  I'd gone to pick up some slide film I'd had processed ... and went into the card shop next door to get the valentines for the kids. ... that one caught my eye and seemed just perfect ,,,

 

That is so sweet of you to say you will keep it forever.  Considering that you supposedly still have a bronze-colored swimsuit you say I wore, and the Gordon Lightfoot cassette, and who knows what else, I believe it. ...

--------

And yes, he still had the bronze-colored swimsuit (that I wore only on the sailboat) and the Gordon Lightfoot cassette tape I gave him, both from 23+ years earlier.

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

Second Date the Second Time Around

Here's a series of e-mails to set up our second date the second time around, which happened on Saturday, February 4, 2006:

from:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
to:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
date:		Mon, Jan 30, 2006, 5:24 PM
subject:		progress

I talked to my son last night, and he asked me to go sailing* with him next Saturday. ... 

 

I assumed that you would be working on Saturday, but I should have asked.

 

Talk to you later.

 

Mark

from:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
to:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
date:		Mon, Jan 30, 2006, 5:47 PM
subject:		Re: progress

Well, I am not working Saturday - at least not at the moment. ... However, I definitely think you should go sailing with your son!  Much as I would like to see you again - and as soon as possible.  IF (and only if) y'all finish up early and YOU are heading home ALONE - don't want to intrude on you and your son - and you aren't beat, I could meet you for dinner somewhere.  Lewisville* isn't too far from Grapevine (or Denton if I happen to be there).  You have my cell.  I can be ready on pretty short notice.

... I am wearing the earrings again today.  later - A

from:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
to:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
date:		Tue, Jan 31, 2006, 2:03 PM
subject:		Saturday

I want to make some time for us on Saturday. I'll leave Lewisville about 4 or 5 pm and call you then. Perhaps we can go to someplace in the area where we had lunch or someplace else that I can find without getting too lost.

 

Let me know what you think.

 

Mark

from:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
to:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
date:		Tue, Jan 31, 2006, 3:03 PM
subject:		Re: Saturday

I'm torn between dying to see you again and not wanting to screw up anything with your son ....  

 

Why don't we play it by ear Saturday?  You might be having a great time with Drew (right name?) and y'all might want to have dinner together.  But if not--well, I'll either be in Denton or Grapevine (probably the latter), and we can connect pretty quickly - just call. ...

from:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
to:		Amanda Pape <*********@gmail.com>
date:		Tue, Jan 31, 2006, 8:52 PM
subject:		Re: Saturday

I plan to be in Lewisville by 9:30am. He will probably have something planned with his girlfriend for later on ... and he will be ready for me to be gone.

 

Plan on my call. I really want to see you.

 

Mark

--------

*There was at least one phone conversation between the e-mails above and the ones below, where we talked about possible places to meet.  Mark had given his 22-foot Catalina sailboat, The Wagon, to his son Drew in 2002, and Drew had it in a marina near where he was living in Lewisville, which is roughly between Grapevine and Denton.

--------

from:		Mark Gresham <megresham@*********>
to:		Amanda Pape <*********@gmail.com>
date:		Thu, Feb 2, 2006, 3:35 PM
subject:		Saturday

Did we decide where to meet on saturday? How about the Main Street Blues Room**? Or any other place that you would like. Let me know.

 

Mark

from:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
to:		Mark Gresham <megresham@*********>
date:		Thu, Feb 2, 2006, 3:42 PM
subject:		Re: Saturday

I thought we decided to meet in the parking lot behind Esparza's, but it might be better to meet at Main Street Blues.   I think the back-up plan was that if we are not allowed into Main Street Blues in our jeans, we'd go to the Italian restaurant (Ravioli's) next to Esparza's.

from:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
to:		Amanda Pape <*********@gmail.com>
date:		Thu, Feb 2, 2006, 4:23 PM
subject:		Re: Saturday

Good plan. See you at Blues. One good thing about Texas; they rarely have dress codes. Too many rich weird people.

 

Mark

from:		Amanda Pape <********@gmail.com>
to:		Mark Gresham <megresham@********>
date:		Thu, Feb 2, 2006, 4:27 PM
subject:		Re: Saturday

... Doesn't matter where we eat - not coming for the food. ;)  Looking forward to your call (hopefully) on Saturday.

--------

So the date did in fact happen on Saturday, February 4, at Main Street Blues in Grapevine (**which no longer exists).  However, Mark was not feeling well.  I wrote this after I got home from our date:

from:		Amanda Pape <*********@gmail.com>
to:		mark gresham <megresham@**********>
date:		Sat, Feb 4, 2006, 11:33 PM
subject:		safe trip

I hope you made it home safely tonight.  Please go see a doctor so I don't get scared like that again. :)

 

Thank you again for a wonderful evening.  I am SO looking forward to next week.  ...

Love, A

--------

Turned out Mark was coming down with something.  We did see each other the following weekend, which resulted in me getting sick with whatever he got.  So, a little break here in our re-romance saga - tune in again on Valentines Day.

Above, Mark talks with "The Sidewalk Judge" - another J. Seward Johnson sculpture (I photographed tons of them in Key West), this one outside the replica Wallis Hotel that houses Messina Hof Winery in Grapevine, on the tenth anniversary of our first date the second time around, January 31, 2016.

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!

Dad Would've Been 96 Today

My sister recently sent me various official documents pertaining to our parents.  She was the executor of their estates, but no longer needed these documents since the estates closed long ago. 

The documents included four related to the birth of our father, Frederick Henry Pape (1929-2017).  I already had copies of three of these, but the first one pictured below was one I had never seen before.  It's a hospital birth certificate, which actually is not an "official" birth certificate, but it played a part in a change made nearly 64 years later.

By the way, I was also born at St. Francis Hospital in Evanston, Illinois, as were many of my first cousins who were also born in the north Chicago area.  I believe it was the only Catholic hospital on the north side of Chicago at the time.

Above:  Hospital birth certificate for Frederick Henry Pape, 4 February 1929

Below:  Original State of Illinois Certificate of Registration of Birth for Frederick John Pape, issued May 1930

Above is the original official state birth certificate, issued in May, 1930, over a year after my father's birth.  Note the middle name on it is John, not Henry.  John was the first name of my father's paternal grandfather, my great-grandfather, John Pape (1851-1945).  Frederick Henry was the full name of Dad's maternal grandfather, my great-grandfather Frederick Henry Massmann (1875-1948).

So what happened?  My father retired from his job in late 1992, and needed his birth certificate, either to apply for his pension, or Social Security, or both.  I'm not sure if he had both documents all along, or had to contact his mother, my paternal grandmother, Elizabeth Florence Massmann Pape (1902-2000), to get one or both of these documents.

My grandmother wanted to name him for her father, and that's what she told whoever in the hospital filled out his hospital birth certificate.  Back then, remember, fathers were almost never in the delivery room.  However, I think my grandfather, Paul Robert Pape (1896-1970), was probably the one who filled out the paperwork submitted to the state for the official birth certificate, and named his second son for his two grandfathers.

It doesn't really matter what my father was "supposed" to be named.  He'd been Frederick Henry Pape in school records, military records, work records, his marriage record, and so on.  So Dad filled out the necessary paperwork (below) to get his birth certificate corrected.  Apparently, unlike here in Texas, he did not need an affidavit from someone else testifying to this correction - or if he did, we don't have a copy of it.  The document did have to be notarized, however.

Above:  State of Illinois Affidavit and Certificate of Correction for Frederick John/Henry Pape, submitted 23 January 1993

Below:  Reissued State of Illinois Certificate of Birth for Frederick Henry Pape, issued 3 February 1993

And above is the reissued birth certificate for my father, almost 64 years to the day after his birth.  I did get some new information from this document, that I did not have before - the address where my grandparents and their two oldest children, Paul Robert "Bob" Pape Jr. (1926-2008) and Elizabeth "Betty" Marie Pape Streff (1927-2017), were living at the time of Dad's birth.  I'd assumed it was their long-time home at 2093 W. Lunt in Chicago (where they were by the time the 1930 Census was taken) but instead it was nearby 2545 W. Coyle.

© Amanda Pape - 2025 - e-mail me!